人类本质上就是一款老旧软件：动不动卡顿、情绪泄露、还特别怕黑。
于是我们发明了神—— 一个能让人类心理不卡屏的外挂程序。
下雨打雷？装个“雷神补丁”，心里瞬间稳定。
考试面试？临时下载个“保佑插件”，感觉智商都自动更新了。
恋爱失败？迅速调用“月老功能”，哪怕只是 placebo，也能让心不蓝屏。
最离谱的是：这个外挂完全免费、不占内存、能跨系统使用——
Windows 祈祷，Mac 祈祷，Linux 甚至能自己编译一个。
说到底，人类需要神，就像手机需要充电宝：不一定高端，但能救命。
Humans are basically an outdated piece of software: we freeze easily,
leak emotions, and are absolutely terrified of the dark.
So we invented gods — a plug-in to keep our mental system from crashing.
Thunderstorm? Install the Thunder God Patch and your inner system stabilizes instantly.
Exam or interview? Download a quick Blessing Add-on and your IQ feels magically updated.
Heartbroken? Activate the Matchmaker Module — even if it’s just placebo,
at least your heart won’t blue-screen.
The funniest part? This plug-in is free, takes zero storage, and runs cross-platform —
Windows users pray, Mac users pray, and Linux users can even compile their own version.
In the end, humans need gods for the same reason phones need power banks:
not fancy, but absolutely life-saving.